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It’s pretty extreme, and this couple had already tried all sorts of other avenues to get back on track. For this woman (who speaks her mind openly and freely almost all the time, as far as I can tell), it was right for her.
And somehow, her action got through to her husband, because he began doing his own therapy to work on his own issues and figure out his role in their marriage. Maybe you have that brief moment where you feel like you’ve been wronged, , and then what?
As other readers chime in, you’ll also get a wider range of advice.
When the kids are young, there’s just no time to talk about everything that’s going on. It’s still there, and if you don’t address it, it eventually destroys your marriage.”“I think it’s important that you’re doing this now.
Normally on Fridays, I run readers questions for Ask Dr. On occasion, however, I’ll get a letter that necessitates going into greater depth than the usual submission.
Sometimes the answer is more complex or requires a deeper dive into the situation.
I work with a lot of couples and a lot of women who come to see me 10, 15 years after the fact, when they realize that these issues are still there, and they’re finally ready to address them.” Interesting, huh?
We think we can sweep our grudges and resentments under the rug–at least for a little while–but then we get busy, or we decide to just leave this stuff for another day, and then somewhere along the way, we forget that they’re still there waiting for us.